10 reasons why Carlos Tevez should force a move to Limavady United

So, the ever troublesome Carlos Tevez has once again been causing unrest at Manchester City this week, after allegedly refusing to come off the bench against Bayern Munich in a crucial Champions League match.  So, if he is genuinely unsettled at the Etihad Stadium, maybe a move to Northern Irish side Limavady United may prove to be just what the Argentine international needs.  Here is 10 reasons why such a move may work for him;

1. Tevez isn’t a fan of the English weather, so perhaps the Northern Irish climate might be more to his liking.

2. Limavady have a clearly ambitious chairman, who is probably next going to fax Santos about the possibility of loaning Neymar, so he can adjust to European football before his inevitable move to Spain next season.

3. Northern Ireland is closer to Argentina than England, with only a mere 6800 miles, and an average sized ocean separately the two countries.

4. Twenty million years ago Argentina and Northern Ireland were in the same continent. Tevez probably has some relatives in Londonderry that he didn’t even know about.

5. Limavady’s Showgrounds Stadium can hold approximately 1500 fans, which is 1499 more fans than Tevez has in the world of football at the time of print.

6. If Tevez refused to go on the pitch during a crucial IFA match, people would probably understand why.

7. Limavady beat Everton in 1985, meaning they have a much better games to win ratio than City do against the Toffees.

8. Argentina and Limavady both play in blue and white strips, so Tevez can imagine he's playing for his national team while he’s scoring his tenth goal of a game against Linfield.


9. Tevez could bond with Limavady’s other foreign player Kevin Roddy, who also comes from a faraway land, the Republic of Ireland.

10. Northern Ireland is roughly the size of the Falkland Islands, which means Tevez can pretend that he is the first Argentine to set foot on the disputed land.

Now I know Tevez is a massive Futera FC fan, as he has recently sad that he would gladly do us the honour of refusing to come off our bench too. So I’m sure that after reading this article, he will be driving like a mad man to get to Manchester City’s training ground and convince Brian Marwood that a loan move to Limavady United is in the best interests of the club, and the next logical step in his football journey.

Remember you heard it here first, and the first was…..that this transfer will probably not happen.


By David James

Premier League Goal of the Weekend

A busy weekend in England's top flight provided fans with plenty of entertainment, and no shortage of top class goals.

Fernando Torres was clinical against Swansea City after a sublime pass from Juan Mata, and across London at the Emirates Stadium Alex Song finished off a comfortable Arsenal victory over Bolton with a well taken goal on his right foot.


But, goal of the weekend goes to the twinkle-toed Portugese winger Nani.  The Manchester United star has started the season in sensational fashion, and he followed up last week's (4K3F6T1F) thunderous drive against Chelsea with an expertly taken goal, on his less favored left foot, against Stoke City at the Britannia Stadium.


After pausing on the ball midway into the opponent's half, Nani played a neat one two with team mate Darren Fletcher, before ghosting between a couple of Stoke defenders, and finally finishing off a well worked move with a decisive left foot drive into the bottom corner of the net.


Another top class goal from one of the Premier League's most impressive players so far this season.

GOAL OF THE WEEKEND: Nani (Manchester United) vs Stoke City

By Laurie Dunsire

Premier League Round-Up

An eventful weekend in the Barclays Premier League saw plenty of red cards as well as goals, in addition to this Manchester City moved back on level terms with Manchester United after Alex Ferguson's men dropped their first points of the season.

The first game of the weekend came at the Etihad stadium, as unbeaten City hosted Everton – who had won all of their last four away fixtures against the club. Roberto Mancini's expensive squad had to show a degree of patience against a well organised Everton side, but eventually managed to claim the win that their overall play merited, with goals coming from Mario Balotelli and James Milner. The win proved to be very important, as the late afternoon kick off at the Britannia Stadium saw Manchester United held 1-1 against a Stoke side who performed fantastically well, and were deserving of their point. Explosive Portugese winger Nani fired the Red Devils in front with a typically brilliant goal, before towering striker Peter Crouch headed the Potters level during the second half.

Earlier in the day Fernando Torres once again found the net, this time against Swansea City, before undoing his good work with a sending off for an ill advised two footed challenge. Chelsea still managed to win the match 4-1, with Brazilian midfielder Ramires scoring a rare double, before Ashley Williams pulled a goal back for the Welsh side. Experienced striker Didier Drogba came off the bench to finish the scoring deep into stoppage time. Across the capital at the Emirates Stadium and Arsenal bounced back from last week's disappointing (970623JM) defeat to Blackburn with a comprehensive 3-0 victory over Bolton. Arsenal captain Robin Van Persie was the hero, as he scored twice, taking his overall tally for the Gunners to an impressive 100 goals. Alex Song added the icing to the cake with a well taken late third goal for Arsene Wenger's under pressure side.

Another team who bounced back from disappointment in their last league outing was Liverpool, who were thumped 4-0 by Spurs last week in North London. Wolves were the visitors to Anfield this weekend, and although a second half goal from Steven Fletcher ensured a nervous finish for the Reds, two goals in the first period through a Roger Johnson own goal and an emphatic left foot finish from Luis Suarez were enough to earn them a 2-1 win.

Newcastle United continued their unbeaten start to the Premier League season as they defeated struggling Blackburn Rovers 3-1, with new signing Demba Ba grabbing an impressive hattrick. Rovers' reply came from the highly rated Junior Hoilett.

West Bromich Albion played out an uninspiring 0-0 draw at home to Martin Jol's Fulham, and Spurs continued their recent resurgence with a hard fought 2-1 away victory against Wigan.  Goals from Rafael van der Vaart and Gareth Bale appeared to have Tottenham on easy street at half time, but a Diame goal early in (757719QX) the second half made it more of a contest, as he reduced the two goal deficit to just one. A red card for Wigan's Gohouri may have dampened their hopes, but they still created chances to level the scores, but could not capitalise on them and the match ended 2-1 to Harry Redknapp's men.

The final game of the weekend took place on Sunday as newly promoted Queens Park Rangers drew 1-1 with Aston Villa at Loftus Road. A second half penalty from Scottish international Barry Bannan looked set to give Villa a vital away win, but an unfortunate injury time own goal from Richard Dunne handed the home side a share of the spoils.


By Laurie Dunsire




Premier League Table

1	Man Utd	6	17	16
2	Man City	6	14	16
3	Chelsea	6	5	13
4	Newcastle	6	4	12
5	Liverpool	6	0	10
6	Tottenham	5	0	9
7	Stoke	6	-2	9
8	Aston Villa	6	2	8
9	QPR	6	-2	8
10	Everton	5	0	7
11	Wolves	6	-3	7
12	Arsenal	6	-5	7
13	Sunderland	5	2	5
14	Norwich	5	-2	5
15	Wigan	6	-4	5
16	Swansea	6	-5	5
17	Fulham	6	-3	4
18	Blackburn	6	-5	4
19	West Brom	6	-5	4
20	Bolton	6	-8	3

Weekend World Football round up: Gunners backfire in North-West as United breeze past Chelsea. Barcelona, Bayern & Napoli all record wins.

Arsenal's problems in defence were highlighted again this weekend at Ewood Park as the former Highbury Club went down 4-3 at the hands of Blackburn Rovers. Two own goals from Alex Song and Laurent Koscielny plus a Yakubu brace left the Gunners reeling as they slipped to 17^th place in the Barclay’s Premier League.

Ironically, all three promoted BPL sides enjoyed fantastic victories over WBA, Wolves and Bolton Wanderers.

Queen’s Park Rangers arguably had the most successful Saturday afternoon as they stormed to an exceptional 3-0 win away at Molineux. Goals from Joey Barton, Alejandro Faurlin and DJ Campbell handed the Hoops a notable three points.

Manchester United made headway over Manchester City after a convincing win at Old Trafford. The Red Devils strolled effortlessly past Chelsea and into a two point lead at the top of the BPL. Fernando Torres scored the Blue's solitary goal but also missed an extraordinary chance in the 82^nd minute that could have handed his Team a much needed life-line.

Liverpool sank to their second consecutive defeat in North London. The Merseysider’s drowned in front of their traveling supporters after a wonderful strike from Luka Modric inside the 20th minute. Jermain Defoe added to Tottenham’s lead with a sublime finish and new boy Adebayor struck twice in a 
4-0 win.

In Spain, Real Madrid slumped to a shock 1-0 defeat away at modest Levante on Sunday whilst rivals Barcelona didn’t endure the same problems as they dismantled Osasuna finding the net a gigantic 8 times.

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Bayern Munich recorded a 2-0 win against Schalke which catapulted them into first place in the German Bundesliga on Sunday, while champions Borussia Dortmund were subjected to a second straight defeat as they lost 2-1 at Hanover.

In Italy, Edinson Cavani bagged a hat trick to help Napoli beat defending champions AC Milan 3-1 on Sunday. Alberto Aquilani gave Milan the lead in the 11th minute but the lead was short-lived with Napoli replying with impressive strikes in the 13th, 36th and 51st minute at the San Paolo stadium.

After losing their last three games, Zeta scored three against Lovćen in Montenegro’s 1st League.

Umm Salal couldn’t find a way past Al Rayyan; both Teams drew 1-1 in the Stars League, Qatar.

And finally… in Romania, Astra Ploieşti saw off Gaz Metan Medias with a brilliant performance that leaves them in 6^th place - one position behind Universitatea Cluj in LIGA I.

Adam Partington